So as you all know, I am a smoker. I didn’t start at the stereotypical age of under 18, some high school peer pressure, I hate my parents rebel act, but it started after my first semester in college and when I entered the work force. Let me tell you, that first job you get, makes you want to pull your hair out. Actually I can understand now why so many choose to stay in college and go from their undergraduate, to their graduate to their Ph.D–school is a safe zone that you are free to be creative and without any burdens of the real world expectations to produce and profit.

So I started with marlboro ultra lights, moved to lights, and then stuck it out through the home stretch on red’s or as they call them cowboy killers. As if smoking red’s somehow embodies the belief that you are strong as a cowboy and you are fighting against the odds to win where so many other daring cowboys had fallen. At any rate, I smoked those steadily through my various careers on through Hostway. Now that is interesting, as I became so much addicted to smoking, that I was going through a pack every few days. Now for some that isn’t a lot, but for me, that was a TON! So that went on for a few years. but I realized that slowly bits and pieces of myself were fading away–blowing away with the smoke and ash.

So I quit. At first I thought to myself that it was going to be harder than it really was, so I did the whole patch method. Boy does that not tell you some of the side effects! Let’s just say, stay close to the bathroom! So that got chucked out and I went cold turkey. And you know what, it wasn’t that hard. So I stayed off the horse for several months, and then work turned for the worst and things became difficult, and I got back on the horse. It’s funny what you go to when you are feeling stressed and under the pressure. Some people go to food, others to drinking, me to smoking.

So that lasted awhile longer and then I stopped again. This time I thought it was going to be for the long haul. But sure enough, Qwest Communications deal landed, and I was back on the horse! Let’s just say that as my time at Hostway started to spiral down the drain, I began to smoke more and more. So much in fact, that when I finally did leave Hostway and start with Lagan, I bought an entire carton of smokes with me to Belfast, thinking A) that everyone in Belfast smoked like chimneys and B) that I was going to also smoke like a chimney.

But you know what I found when I got there, that things weren’t at a point that they were for several months before. That I ended up smoking primarily out of habit, vs need. So you know what, when I got back to the States, I ended up quiting the habit. So as of today, I am now over a month off the horse and it feels—so so! Hey now, I can’t say it’s all joy and happiness as I’m hacking up a storm, but it does feel good again to not be burdened by the film and illness that is smoking. Hopefully this time it is for good, let’s hope and pray! So the New Years resolution has begun early, and let’s make it a good 2008!